KH characters ReLeAsEd
by Zocoria
Summary: okay, this is when i go and make parodies of anyone in KH, mostly org. 13 because ha, its funny  .
1. Xaldin's Secret

OH EM GEE, I don't know how I'm going to do this…. Please REVIEW!!!

Oh and the chapter names wont make sense.

You shouldn't read this if you're a big fan of Lexaueus (I know most of you are like who is he?) lol

_**CHapTEr ONE**_

Indolence of the tribute

"Where are we going?" said Lexaueus

"Just shut up and follow me idiot!" said a mean Xaldin.

Lexaueus and Xaldin are in the Organization XII tower, Xaldin as eager as he is, wants to be as better as everyone else, he tries so hard, and he fails miserably, so now he turns to the tards.

Lexaueus was jumping up and down screaming, "PRESENT FOR LEXY, PRESENT FOR LEXY!!!"

"NO you twit!" said Xaldin cold hearted.

Xaldin trucked on down one of the halls in the tower with a great big giant of a person crying behind him.

"Will you STOP crying!" said Xaldin tensed.

As Lexaueus and Xaldin were walking down the hall, Lexaueus was leaving a river of tears on the ground.

"Aw, whats wrong big guy?" said a Larxene.

Xaldin stopped walking and turned around, to only see Larxene holding a big Lexaueus in her arms. Hugging him, swaying back and forth.

"XALDIN CALL LEXY DUMB!!!" hollered Lexaueus loudly.

"Uhhh no I didn't!" said Xaldin, "He is lieing!"

"Why don't you go on somewhere Xaldin, you caused enough trouble today!" said Larxene.

"Oh my god!" continued Xaldin, "I need him for something!"

"Whos dumb?" said a Saix.

"It's okay Saix, I got it covered!" said Larxene.

"NO!" screamed Saix, "just because you're the only girl in the group doesn't mean that you get to mother everyone around, you may boss everyone else around but not me, I'm a man, woman should be bowing down to me!"

Saix crossed his arms and stared evily at Larxene.

Larxene tilted her head to the side, it cracked, Saix's face changed, what looked evil now looked scared.

"RUN!" screamed Larxene, Saix dashed from the door in the hall that which he came out at, "Im gonna KILL you bitch, you better run!!! I like it when they run!!!!" continued Larxene, "summon your weapon so I can shove it up your ASS!!!!"

Larxenes and Saix's voice became smaller and smaller until Xaldin and Lexaueus couldn't here them.

"So," said Xaldin, "Shall we?" Xaldin pointed down the hall, and both of them went on down the hall.

"Where are you taking me?" said Lexaueus.

"I'm taking you to my room," said Xaldin.

"Are you going to do that stuff that Axle does to me?" said Lexaueus.

"What are you talking about!!??" shouted Xaldin looking over his shoulder at Lexaueus.

"He put his…" continued Lexaueus, but then Xaldin cut him off, "I really don't want to know!"

.,,+ 25 minutes later +,,.

"We are here," said Xaldin.

Xaldin turned around to see Lexaueus, but to his surprise he also saw a Roxas.

"Uh hi Roxas?" said Xaldin.

"Hiya!" said Roxas.

Xaldin took a key out of his pocket and put it into a lock that was on a really tall door that was in the hall, several clicks went off in the door, followed by a light bell chime. Xaldin pushed open the door, a gust of wind blew out, a disgusting smell of death, Lexaueus and Roxas covered both of their noses, Roxas had tears of pain in his eyes.

"It smells soooo bad!" Roxas fell to the floor passed out.

Roxas was in a very weird position, his neck touching the hall wall and his butt perched high in the air.

Xaldin sniffed the air, "Nothing new" he said.

Lexaueus followed Xaldin into his room.

"What is it, let me go, I can bear the smell!" said Lexaueus

"Hold on let me get it," said Xaldin.

Lexaueus and Xaldin walked deeper into Xaldin's room.

MEANWHILE

Outside Xaldins room, Axle walked on by, saw Roxas on the floor, and could only think to himself… ADVANTAGE…ADVANTAGE… but then Axle thought to himself, "Nah its not worth it, it isn't what it seems, been there, tapped that, not fine jewelry."

Axle walked away

BACK TO THE STORY 

Xaldin and Lexaueus reached the back of the room, there was a drawer, Xaldin bent down to open the first shelf, and pulled out a book, "here."

"What is it?" said Lexaueus.

"My coin collection of course!" said Xaldin happily

Lexaueus's face went blank, summoned his weapon and waked Xaldin across the head.

DE END

Yeah I know there is many parodies of these out there

But come on now mine is the best : please whenever

GOOD REVIEWS :K


	2. Fun on an Island

Numero dos, see I'm getting there….

Read and enjoy

_**Chapter 2**_

_**The frog jumped from the tree**_

It was all good back at home, Sora, Riku, and Kairi all back together on their little island.

"Hey guys!" said Kairi as she walked off a dock from her boat.

Riku and Sora were sunbathing on the beach.

"Oh, hi Kairi," said Sora, "What's up?"

"Nothing much, I couldn't be away from the both of you for too long, my doctor says I might forget you again!" said Kairi, "apparently I can lose memories of a lot of things, if I forget about them for even a minute, so I came to see you guys."

"Oh, well that will suck if you forgot us again, maybe we can cure it?"

"We could try," said Kairi happily, "what do you think Riku?"

Kari looked down towards Riku, Sora went back to sunbathing.

"Hello?" continued Kairi, "Riku can you hear me?"

Kairi went down on her knees like she always does and looked over Riku's face, she noticed he had earphones on, she went to take one out, when Riku woke up and sat up fast, bumping heads with Kairi.

"What the hell is your problem?!" said Kairi furiously.

Riku took his earphones out and stood up, " you were the one who was all over me, I should be asking what your problem is!"

"I need to tell you something!" Kairi continued, "ITS uh-"

"Yeah what is it?" said Riku.

"Ha ha, I forgot!" proclaimed Kairi.

"What were you listening too?" asked Kairi.

"My favorite song of course." said Riku.

"You have a favorite song?" said Kairi rolling her eyes.

"Yeah…" continued Riku.

"Then tell me what its called then," said Kairi.

"No," said Riku.

After millions of yes no yes no yes no's Kairi had inserted a couple of why's, pleases and a long dragged out uhhhhhhhh, they were all answered with a no.

"Riku just please tell me!" said Kairi, "I want to know the song!"

Riku sighed and handed an earphone piece to Kairi, "Hear, listen."

After about 20 seconds of listening, "Your gay!" said Kairi coldly.

"What the hell?" said Riku, "it's a good song."

"No Riku, this song is really old, it isn't cool anymore!" said Kairi.

"I'm not gay!" screamed Riku, "and that is a really good song!"

"This song is like very old, like 2 years!" said Kairi.

Kairi pulled on the earphone piece, and luckily a little MP3 player came out of Riku's pocket, Kairi quickly grabbed it, and jumped back getting ready to run if Riku tried to catch her. But Riku only looked down at the ground.

Kairi began to search through the MP3 player, "wow I never seen a guy with so much of, this crap on his MP3 player!" said Kairi.

Sora finally caught up with the group, "Huh? What song was it called Kairi?"

"Passions by Utada Hikaru!" said Kairi smartedly.

"She is on my MP3 player," said Sora.

Kairi looked at Sora. Sora looked back.

"Wow, you too are made for each other!" said Kairi.

Sora and Riku made eye contact, "I think we are," they said at the same time.

Kairi's face went pale.

"No Sora, we are supposed to be together!" said Kairi, with tears swelling in her eyes.

Sora stood up and walked closer to the ocean water, placed his feat in and sat down.

"This isn't supposed to end like this!" said Kairi, "it was supposed to end, with me and Sora being together and you Riku, is supposed to die!"

"Why do I have to die!" screamed Riku.

"Why cant it be me and Riku, and Kairi has to die!" said Sora with a plan.

"Yes Sora that sounds like a perfect plan!" said Riku.

Both Riku and Sora looked at Kairi who was now, crying and walking backwards. Sora stood up from the water and walked over to Riku, who had stood up as well.

"So how do you think we should do this?" said Riku.

"Just catch her!" screamed Sora.

Sora dived for Kairi who in fact quickly out smarted Sora by already running to her boat, Riku followed after her, Riku was so close, Kairi jumped into her boat from the dock and quickly paddled away.

"We almost got her," said Sora.

"Well we can catch her next time," said Riku, "I mean she is gonna be back over here in like 5 minutes, she keeps forgetting!"

"Your right, maybe we should try and find a cure for her memory problems!" said Sora.

Riku laughed, "yeah your right, but in the meantime lets continue our sunbathing."

"I cant believe she thought we were actually gay," said Sora.

"No Sora, I know what your trying to do, it will never work out!" said Riku.

Sora's face saddened. Riku placed his earphones back into his ears and started listening to Utada Hikaru again.

"I wonder what are next song will be called," said Sora to himself.

"I don't know," replied Sora.

"I can't wait," said Sora.

_**DE END**_

Well yeah, I made Sora a little freaky at the end, but all is good!

PLEASE good reviews if you must :


	3. Luxord Sucks

_**Chapter 3**_

_**Watching the Birds Fly By**_

It was a tight match, nobody knew who was winning, it was a Friday night, people could have been cheating, thus nobody would care.

"So," said Axle.

"So indeed," said Xemnas.

Larxene looked at Axle, "look shut up, your ruining my concentration."

"Bitch please!" said Axle, looking over his cards.

Luxord was looking over his cards, thinking, "im gonna win!"

Every night on Friday the whole entire Organization 13 would have a strip joker tournament.

Luxord continued to look over his cards. He knew he was going to win, he was the card master, Axle and Larxene were fighting, Xemnas was looking at the bright light above the table, Demyx and Roxas were both watching Axle talk, Marluxia looked as if he was putting on makeup in a handheld mirror, Saix was going over battle plans in his notebook, Lexaeus had a few of his cards flipped upside down, Vexen couldn't even read, Xaldin was asleep, and Zigbar was waxing his guns. But then there was Zexion, he had his cards out, looking at them, eyeing them carefully. Luxord knew he could over power him.

"You Zexion!" screamed Luxord, "I raise you 20 chips!"

"Yours bluffin," said Zexion.

Luxord was mad, "How dare you! Do you know how many times I one?"

"Well lets see," replied Zexion, he paused and thought for a second, "about 152,234 times?"

"HAH!" screamed Luxord, "Your wrong! It is 153,234 times!"

"Big difference," said Xexion, "you only win, because you like to see us naked, and we don't care to play!"

"Axle I think your losing!" said Roxas, "you should take off your cloak."

"I could care less if you are all naked!" said Luxord, "I just want to win!!!"

"We don't really care," replied Zexion.

"You should!" said Luxord, "This is the best sport ever!"

"Putting on your shoes is a better sport than this!" said Zexion.

"Take that back!" pleaded Luxord.

Zexion looked at Luxord and shook his head slowly.

All of a sudden everyone focused back into the game, or something like that.

Luxord dropped his cards on the table crying, he had a 2,6,1, and a king.

Everyone else had something that was worth more than Luxords.

"Wow," said Zexion, "Looks like I win, Luxord is naked for the rest of the week!"

"Yeah," said everybody.

"But I never lose!" cried Luxord.

"AXLE I HATE YOU!!!" screamed Roxas and Demyx at the same time, "why didn't you lose!!!"

"This is impossible! This isn't happening!" cried Luxord.

In Case if you didn't know, this was what we think went on that night to Luxords "suicide".


End file.
